Thursday, January 30, 2014

Entry #2: Amygdalla-gedon

Phew.

Better days, brighter days - that's the mantra. That's the mantra that's helping me to lift my soul out of the drainage ditch it's been in for the past year and a half. Better days, brighter days - I say it over and over again. I repeat it as often as a recovering PTS patient breaths in the words "I am" and blows out the words "here".

For the past year and a half I've been living in limbo without much relief or hope. But things are on the upswing again and I have to put some focus on repairing the wear and tear I feel not only emotionally but in my brain - I need to center and regroup, let frustration and fear take a much needed nap, and get a handle on what needs to be done in order for me to have better days, brighter days. I also need to be clear enough to prepare for the opportunities that have been handed to me recently....can't do that if I'm still running my brain like a cornered wild child or a terrified rabbit on crack.

Without question, the past 20 months or so have been appallingly difficult but I am re-remembering how to relax my tightly wound Amygdalla, calm my Hypothallamus  and  not obsess over anything that isn't (art) work related. I'm also trying not to fret over the amount of damage the past 20 months have done to my little egghead even though my brain feels floaty...like I'm outside my head and second guessing my every thought. I'm hoping my mantra can help repair the broken bits while I re-remember how to breath deep, let shit go and think: Better days, brighter days.



Amygdalla-gedon aside, over the past 3 or 4 days I've managed to help put together my new website, upload  approx. 150 images, pull together files, documents and photos for my new gallery and restart blogging. All in all not a bad start. Now, let's see what today brings - whatever it is, good or bad, I  I will just keep repeating "better days, brighter days".

To see the new website visit: http://becklane42.wix.com/becklaneartist

If you'd like to review the 2013 Bloggastan meltdown visit: becklaneartist2013.blogspot.com/
 

Wednesday, January 29, 2014

Entry #1 - Triggering the thalamus

Okay, so I'm a little late in the game this year - it's almost the end of January and I'm just starting my new blog now..... but there we are, there we are, and here I am. In my new live/work space, working with a new, progressive gallery, with a new solo show coming up, and a boat load of opportunities. AND for the first time in a very long time - I don't feel all that lost. In fact, I'm starting to feel.......up-ish and hopeful-ly-ish.
 
It's been a struggle for me to shift gears - to change from being in a constant state of frustration and sadness to feeling clear and productive but I've decided to make an effort to rid myself of my own sadness and plant the phrase "brighter days" in my little thalamus and focus on what needs to be done to make the most of 2014 instead of letting my lackluster 2013 (and 1/2 lackluster 2012) envelop my every thought.
 
Brighter days, brighter days...that's gonna be my mantra.....when I start to feel upset or sad or frustrated or overwhelmed I am going to think my way to better, brighter, more productive days. 
 
The usual path my positive thoughts take.
 
The path my "brighter days" mantra is HOPEFULLY going to take -
 a comparatively straighter path to the thalamus and straight-ish towards developing
this year into what I want it to be.

Oh, check out my new website - 100s of pieces of work, pics of my studio and links to my Youtube vids and other links available at: http://becklane42.wix.com/becklaneartist